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An Alternative Display

23 November 2009 - 4:00am — Christopher Wright
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Help Desk, by Christopher B. Wright
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I should note at this point that Google didn't actually patent the process of displaying a patent, though a news article on Slashdot appears to suggest otherwise. They have, however, registered a design patent for a web application that displays patents. Essentially they've patented the design of the user interface for their patent search web application.

At least, that's what it looks like to me, but I Am Not A Lawyer -- I simply mock them on the Internet.

Comic Transcript

VIKTOR SCHRECK: We have a problem.

THE BOSS: Since you are due in court today, I assume you have discovered the validity of our patent is in question.

VIKTOR SCHRECK: Oh, no. Our patent is valid, and the defendant is definitely liable. In fact, our case would be 100% airtight if it weren't for an... unexpected roadblock concerning the presentation of evidence.

THE BOSS: What do you mean?

VIKTOR SCHRECK: Normally I would say to the judge "I would like to present to you Exhibit A" and hand him a copy of the patent, but very recently one of our competitors managed to patent the display of patents.

THE BOSS: Competitor? Which competitor?

VIKTOR SCHRECK: Google.

THE BOSS: Curse you, Google!

VIKTOR SCHRECK: I suppose licensing their patent is out of the question.

THE BOSS: I will never give Google that satisfaction! Find another way to win the case.

NARRATOR: LATER THAT DAY

VIKTOR SCHRECK: Your Honor, I will now explain our patent through interpretive dance.

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Comments

Mocking...

23 November 2009 - 9:16am — David Nale

"At least, that's what it looks like to me, but I Am Not A Lawyer -- I simply mock them on the Internet."

It is dirty work, but someone has to do it...

BWAH!

23 November 2009 - 10:04am — MarkHB

First, the line about interpretive dance was LOL-funny.

Second, "Patenting With The Stars"... maybe the part of the bailiff is played by Tom Bergeron?

Third, regarding your coda... are we actually meant to believe any story that runs on Slashdot? :)

Well...

23 November 2009 - 10:39am — Christopher Wright

You have to take the articles and the comments together, filtering out the deliberately inflammatory comments, and focusing on all the comments dealing with how the article got it wrong.

I like to imagine Viktor's

23 November 2009 - 1:42pm — Angie K

I like to imagine Viktor's voice quavering a little as he says that last line. Maybe suddenly going up an octave on the second syllable of the word "interpretive."

Ahem.

24 November 2009 - 5:24am — Random Blunt Object (not verified)

Definitely.

This would be awesomely

24 November 2009 - 8:54pm — 10_0_0_1 (not verified)

This would be awesomely hilarious to see animated.

OT Re: Google Wave

25 November 2009 - 8:57am — MarkHB

I had someone invite me, and it took 2-3 days for the invitation to actually show up. Apparently they have a FAQ that claims they "have a lot of stamps to lick." Not sure if that's a sign that they want to start charging postage on email.

Re: OT Re: Google Wave

25 November 2009 - 3:00pm — Christopher Wright

I've been waiting about three weeks now. Apparently they ran out of spit.

Shall we....

27 November 2009 - 9:59am — David Nale

Shall we all join together and send them a new supply of spit?