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The Bureaucracy of Evil

15 November 2007 - 10:32am — Christopher Wright
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Help Desk, by Christopher B. Wright
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Comic Transcript

ALICE: It's been a week and we still can't find her.

BOSS: This is unacceptable! I want this woman found, immediately!

ALICE: It's going to be hard to do, Boss. Our campus has miles of human-sized ventilation shafts. we don't have the personnel we need to search them all simultaneously.

BOSS: Curses!

ALICE: If you don't mind me saying so, it seems a little strange that our ventilation ducts are so large. Isn't that a little unnecessary?

BOSS: It is both unnecessary and wasteful. However, the "Overlord Achilles Heel Act" of 1953 requires that an complex run by an evil megalomaniac must contain at least one design flaw.

ALICE: I see.

BOSS: I decided this was safer than installing a shiny red self destruct button.

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Comments

The Proofreaders Act of 1982

15 November 2007 - 11:44am — GreenEgg (not verified)

Requires you to misspell at least one word in your comic :D

You misspelled "personnel"

I would personally have chosen the "No Handrails on Catwalks" option. It cuts down on your pension plan expenses.

:D

15 November 2007 - 12:18pm — Christopher Wright

You know, I often wonder how it is that I can have so many damn typos in my comic and not have them in the work I do professionally. I've hit upon three reasons:

1. I spend a lot more time on my professional work, since it's what I get paid to do, and therefore I catch more of them

2. The tools I use have more built in proofing capabilities (i.e., Inkscape does not have spellcheck)

3. I karmically balance my reduced typos in the professional world by introducing them into the comic. Thus is the balance in the universe maintained.

The Cure for Typos

15 November 2007 - 3:40pm — OldLady (not verified)

Actually, I think you just need more snickerdoodles. That would give you the extra energy boost you need to seek and destroy those sneaky typos. I await your next installment with great joy and anticipation -- typos or no typos. The storyline is just wonderful!

You know...

15 November 2007 - 4:37pm — Muse Unchained (not verified)

If the base is ever attacked by starfighters, those ducts will be the first place they aim for >>

Standard...

15 November 2007 - 5:01pm — MuseUnchained

Standard procedure since that Skywalker kid got lucky at Yavin.

(Note to self, log in if you're going to want to edit messages after)

Google's smarter

15 November 2007 - 5:34pm — Anonymous (not verified)

If so then Ubersoft ain't that smart, you see Google's design flaw is that they don't have a roof/ceiling instead they have a man eatting monster thing...

I don't think a man eating

15 November 2007 - 9:51pm — ilec (not verified)

I don't think a man eating monster in the ceiling is a Design flaw in an Evil corporation. I Think of it more like the Google version of Binky...

Evil Overlord List

16 November 2007 - 8:42am — Martin (not verified)

Concerning design flaws in evil lairs, I just feel oblidged to point out the Evil Overlord List. For the benefit ofe those few who don't know it yet.

The Boss

16 November 2007 - 10:57am — SeS_1066

I note that The BOSS remains sans identifier since #1470 when said identifier relapsed into Google(tm)ification. The trauma must be wearing by this point.

First posting by a long-time lurker / OS/2 fan / MacBook Pro using Parallels & WinXp - The more layers you add, the deeper into the woods you get when the inevitable breakdown happens!

Genuine Evil is Narcissticisn in extremis