Comic Transcript

JIM WASHINGTON: Ubersoft issued a statement today responding to the finding of fact issued by the Judge earlier this afternoon.

VIKTOR SCHRECK: We don't agree with the Judge's findings. We're a very holy company.

JIM WASHINGTON: The President and CEO of Ubersoft issued his own statement to the press via video.

BOSS: I will destroy you! I WILL DESTROY YOU ALL!

JIM WASHINGTON: Ubersoft declined to comment on the subtext of his statement.

BOSS: Of course, I mean that only in the holiest of contexts...